I have been reading Dr. Raven's last blog entry and thinking about how what he's talking about applies to myself.
In my last entry, I commented on how I got side-tracked from the message of love I had wanted to write about, and include the Tannhauser piece with, by ranting about Paul and what a fucking asshole he could be. Or whoever it was that is claiming to be Paul in the letters. There's some contention that Paul himself may have been a Gnostic teacher, and that the Pauline letters are attributed to him to cover up his past as a Gnostic. I have no idea if those ideas have any veracity or not, I'm simply aware of them.
But – it becomes hard for me to sort my loathing for the poison that I was introduced to as a child and teenager, with the actual message of Christ: which, ultimately, is a message of love. It also becomes hard for me – especially if I've become emotional about the subject – to express the distinction between Christ's message, and that of some his followers. And, when I really become riled up and ranting, I forget about all the people out there who actually have spiritual uplifting experiences as a Christian.
And that the ideas which are spread around today, might not exist (as an edifice of the church) in a hundred, or a thousand years.
And when that happens, I pretty much treat the entire history of Christianity as a thing of dogshit and horror. Which is, honestly, wrong.
The real fact of the matter is that cultures and civilizations, and the religions within them, play against one another constantly. They dance with one another, in a sense. And this dance includes Christianity, Islam, classical cultures, and everything else around us. We are – as humans – social creatures. Discounting the religious significance of Christianity is wrong.
That doesn't mean that I don't think I can have objections about various matters, which I do. But when I get caught up in my loathing toward things I was exposed to in the past, I do further injustice to the matter by passing on my hate to others.
My hope is that in the future, when writing such things, I will better maintain my awareness of my emotional state and how it dictates what flows out of my keyboard. I doubt that I'll always succeed, but henceforth I'm going to talk less about what I loathe in Christianity, and more about what I like (when the moment dawns).